And on the Lighter Side...

Now I don't normally and so blatantly steal other people's shit but this one I had to gank. It is copied and pasted directly from a Texas lady's website...I mean it is not a Lady's website like for women in general, it is the site of a single woman from Texas...I mean not 'single' like un-married, just ONE woman from Texas's website...I mean not Texas' website...ok there is a woman in Dallas who has a website...ya' know what fuck it. Here is what she wrote:



My dad just sent me these. My dad is awesome. --- AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES!!!

1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you will be afraid to cough.

7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. ---


P.S. Is MySpace seriously running a Bratz ad campaign on my browser? Have any of you girls seen this? What the hell about my stats makes them think I'm in the Bratz target demographic? PFFFT.




I agree, you should ALWAYS get someone else to hold the veggies.